The Ditsy Chronicles

Cleo Twyford is dodging minor disasters, indulging in
chick chat and wielding random insignificant theories.
(And talking about herself in third person)

 
I am a walking cliche
Friday, October 21, 2005
All the bad things about women - that's me, apparently. I eat far too much chocolate, buy far too many pairs of expensive shoes, am far too irrational sometimes, but claim not to far-t. And well if I do I say it's like a butterfly breathing out. Titter.

I also procrastinate, believe my Stars, anxiety eat, faff, spend far too much time obsessing about my (v. frizzy) hair, and have watched at least five sappy romantic movies more than once. Yeah, okay, so I can quote a couple of them verbatim.
posted by Cleo Twyford @ 6:32 PM    
7 Comments:
  • At 11:23 AM, Kimi said…

    In your role as pluckologist I was wondering if you had experienced this strange phenomenon. It is my hypothesis that the more alcohol you consume, the quicker and more prolific your eyebrows grow. Ordinarily I pluck every 4 days, however I appear to gain mutant brow hairs that weren't there previously after a night on the booze.And we all know it's unwise to attempt to pluck if you have shaky hangover hands. Why? Does this happen to anyone else?

     
  • At 1:07 PM, Cleo Twyford said…

    YES! And also sunshine. It's like if I spend a day at the beach, suddenly there's face photosynthesis and I'm a hairy monster. I guess the message here is don't ever drink alcohol in the sunshine. I would have to have a day off work to address that kind of crisis outbreak :)

     
  • At 7:46 AM, I.Mc said…

    Thanks for the answer, I've been wondering if women did actually fart or not because my girlfriend has a right go at me when I do and I can't understand how she manages not too.

     
  • At 9:33 AM, Cleo Twyford said…

    To be honest Iain I think my whole gender needs some serious therapy on the issue. Loud and proud, i say!

     
  • At 3:39 PM, soozy boozy said…

    I experience rapid hair growth after drinking binge - but strangely only with beer. Of course! It must be the yeast!

     
  • At 4:52 PM, rn_buffoon said…

    My Sisters and I do a great movie-length narrarion of Tootsie and The Wizard of Oz. But can't everybody?

     
  • At 10:15 AM, Cleo Twyford said…

    "I'm not mentally ill, but proud, and lucky, and strong enough to be the woman that was the best part of my manhood. The best part of myself." No not me ;)

     
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This blog is blathered by a 30-something constant bridesmaid sometimes known as:
Cleo Twyford
Who trips over a lot in:
Melbourne, Victoria, AU

About Me:
Confession: I am really bad at reverse parking Confession 2: I have an inner Evil Bridesmaid Confession 3: I have mastered fridge-grazing as a meal option Confession 4: There is a committee in my head and sometimes they are loud. Yes, okay you can shut up now. I said shut up. Sorry about that.
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"It's Bridget Jones meets Indiana Jones"



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